Thank you. Never even missed it ... you are very kind. Maybe I can return the favor someday.So here's the question: do I just hope that he pays it forward some day, or can I make an explicit suggestion that he do something in return, like make a charitable contribution of whatever amount he deems appropriate to some worthy apolitical cause of my naming? Does the fact that it's The Holiday Season increase or decrease my ability to make such an ask?
Saturday, December 11, 2010
DEAR UNCLE RANDY: So I was riding on the train to NYC yesterday for a business function, and the gentleman who was sitting next to me got off at Newark and, I discovered, left his expensive-looking silver business card case in the seat. I opened the case and ascertained its owner, then emailed him offering to return the case to the address listed on the card. Within hours he wrote back:
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"do I just hope that he pays it forward some day, or can I make an explicit suggestion that he do something in return, like make a charitable contribution of whatever amount he deems appropriate to some worthy apolitical cause of my naming?"
ReplyDeleteNeither. You send it back because it's the right thing to do. He owes you his thanks and nothing more. If he does return the favor someday, or pays it forward in some other form, that's gravy.
I'm with Eric on this one.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Eric too. Though I do think it would have been proper for him to at least offer to reimburse your expenses.
ReplyDeleteI had a similar incident a few months ago, which turned into a funny-ish story. I left my Blackberry in a cab on the way to Logan Airport (in Boston) on a Friday evening. I realized I had done it about a minute after exiting the cab, but it was too late. During my flight back to DC, a young woman found it. She texted and called a few people on my contacts list telling them that they should tell me to come to a particular nightclub to get it. (Side note: based on Google, the club doesn't exist, or at least not under the name she was giving people.) One friend, not even realizing that the club was in Boston, said "yeah, I think he'll probably just pay you to send it to him or something." She was totally fine with that and told me to call the phone to arrange details. I tried on Friday night, on Saturday, and on Sunday, to no avail. By Sunday, it was clear that the battery had drained, and I was going right to (my own) voice mail. On Monday, I made arrangements to get a new device. Then, on Tuesday, I get an email from someone ELSE saying "Hey, I found your Blackberry in a cab yesterday [Monday]. How can I get it back to you?" So, the nightclub woman found my Berry in one cab, and then lost (or ditched) it in another cab.
Anyway, I told the new guy that if he would be so kind as to fed-ex it back, I would reimburse him "with a little extra for your troubles." But he was very direct about not wanting anything for it -- in fact, he asked whether I could just give him a FedEx number that he could use. Which I did. (He worked at a reputable place, so I didn't have much worry about him abusing the number.)
I have to say that reading the first finder's various text exchanges once I had the device back was pretty amusing.
All that said, I will certainly aim to "pay it forward," but it's not really because of this specific incident. Like Eric, I think it's just the right thing to do, on either end. I suspect you agree.
ReplyDeleteYep, also with Eric on this.
ReplyDeleteMy interpretation of the question is that Adam is intending to send it back regardless, but isn't sure whether he can make a specific request as to how the recipient "pays it forward" My feeling is that you send it back and just suggest that he pay it forward, but not specifically suggest how, regardless of The Season.
ReplyDeleteInsist you'll return it only after he saves Newark from its impending municipal bankruptcy and decades of general corruption and urban decay.
ReplyDeleteReturn it and insist he pay it forward by filling to world with "Tons of f***ing sequins!" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCFuR1s4h5Q&feature=player_embedded
ReplyDeleteReturn it to him but ask that he never use the phrase "pay it forward" as it reminds many of us of the wasted hours we spent watching that terrible movie of the same name.
ReplyDeleteI think making suggestions for him to pay it forward financially are inappropriate and will likely not be heeded. I know I would blow a suggestion like that off entirely.
ReplyDeleteWhat I think you can get away with is an awareness type of thing:
"I shipped your case today- it should arrive in the next day or so. Don't worry about the cost of shipping; it was something I was happy to do. The next time you have some time, though, take a minute and glance at this website: http://www.newarkessexpride.org/news.php It's something I believe in.
Have a Merry Christmas!"
Thanks, everyone.<span> </span>
ReplyDeleteThat's an unfortunate URL, Rick, as on a quick glance I missed the "es" after "newark."
ReplyDeletePlease donate to New Ark's Sex Pride, where it's always "two by two." It could work.
ReplyDeletethat would make a good "auto-tune the news" segment
ReplyDeleteBut I didn't do anything.
ReplyDelete