Thursday, July 8, 2004

SOME STIFF COMPETITION FOR OBAMA: Former Chicago Bears coach and current erectile dysfunction drug pusher Mike Ditka is being urged to toss his gum into the Illinois race for U.S. senator, taking the GOP spot recently abandoned by Jack Ryan.

Why Ditka? Well, for one, it seems Da Coach has been giving his fair share of cash to Republicans for a over a decade. Plus, Ditka has shown he isn't afraid to embrace lost causes.

But given Ditka's past pattern of willful ignorance of facts ("I find it hard to believe that people try to shove the secondhand smoke theory down your throat because I don't believe it. I don't believe it even hurts you. It might make your hair smell a little bit, but that's about it.") and his temperament, I have to believe the only pork the coach will be dishing out in the years to come will be at his restaurant.

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